untitled

j o y c e

Tried to take a picture; Of love
I wanna fill this new frame; But it's Empty

♔empty♔

im still trying to think of what to do to fill up this space

Tried to write a letter; In ink
I've got a peice of paper; But it's Empty

Saturday, November 22, 2008 ( 3:45 AM )

i have FINALLY passed my diving theory test! =D

tmr midnight will be flying off to egypt! zomg im really very very excited i cant sleep! haha erm not to mention, though as excited as i am, i still haven't really finished packing my luggage at all.. bcoz i HATE packing! (and unpacking as well when we come back)

ahh.. n tmr theres performance at hui an gong hui .. LOL i'll probably screw up! have not been training since august and i have not put in any effort.. shucks. how bad i am..

anyway, lunch with jieru n talk talk talked for hours!! almost forgot i had my test! wahaha n today is a crazy day.. eat eat eat non stop! come to think of it, i am STILL hungry! luckily im safe in my room n away from any food now.. im like a crazy eating machine! damn. soon i'll become a big fat blog of fat n roll around the house. (haha! the mental image i got from that was really quite funny!)

shit. n i SHOULD cycle tmr to make up for it.. but.. im lazy..haha.. okie i will TRY (i have to write this here to give me some motivation, yes it sounds redundantn may not work but its worth a try! n now im talking to myslef, which is rly quite ridiculous)

so! tmr midnight will be flying off to 2 wks of camels, mummies, pyramids and a vast abundance of sand =D

Friday, November 21, 2008 ( 12:54 AM )

ooohh finished the 2nd book today! =D

im so excited.. im literally devouring books.. wahaha

which reminds me, ive gotta start packing luggage tmr! spent the whole afternoon sleeping lyk a pig after finishing the book.. so tired out! haha im thinking if i should start on book 3 tmr or read some other thing instead..

hmm.

meeting jieru tmr for lunch! =) been so long since we talked/met up.. im glad her A lvls r finally over!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008 ( 10:12 PM )

met up with xinni today (finally!) but b4 that i went to finish up my medical checkup to apply for my student visa.. which was such a waste of money!! but necessary. =( jus take height n weight, check eyesight, check bld pressure, the doc only listen my heartbeat for 1 sec -.-" how dumb! i think she just went through the motions without thinking or making any effort to pay any attn! nt that i want sth to go wrong but it would be nice if she could take a little more pride in her work please! n yes, urine test.

ok well skip tat part! as i was saying, me n xinni ended up having dinner at billy bombers at bugis! i lovee the thick shake! i tried the coffee chip one.. we got some lucky draw vouchers as well! so we can go back next time to use them =D while waiting for xinni b4 she arrived, i bought 3 books from borders : Sophies World, Eclipse, and The Last Lecture.. hehe! and i bought a really cool snake necklace/bracelet thing too! its really versatile so u can bend it n design it any way u want! in the end i brought xinni there to buy one too! but hers no snake..

now i have many nice books on my hands =) im in bliss.

its ice cream week this week i tell u! everyday eat ice cream! im in a good mood!

but jialat ah!! i seem to keep spending money non stop! zomg! haha me n xinni were walking around bugis randomly after dinner n we already spotted so many things to buy! luckily we exercised some self-control.. haha when i spend, i spend like nobody's business. either that, or i dont spend at all! so hmmm.. next time we go on a shopping spree, i'll bet we'd blow a couple hundred bucks unless we stop each other from buying too many things which we dont need LOL

spending money feels good!

( 12:39 AM )

stephanie meyer had me enthralled all the way through Twilight, her first book. So i finished it in one day! went to buy the 2nd book the next day so im reading it now =) so hooked on it! its hard to find good books that keep me engrossed im so happy when i read these kind of books. the kind that pulls me in the moment i start reading. its cliche but yes, it really draws me INTO their world, like im watching a movie.

now i cant wait for the movie (twilight) to start showing in the cinemas! i think its dec 21 or sth.. watched some trailers.. it looks awesome..awesomely romantic as well..

i really like the male lead in the story.. he's so.. charming! haha the heros in storybooks are always the most heroic, self-sacrificing, romantic n heart-melt-worthy.. LOL! i think i have a thing for fictional guys.. haha

n then again,

Don't you ever wish your life were a storybook?

well, I do! it be nice =) especially if its a fantasy or romance novel... haha no mystery-CSI-FBI kinda thing for me! i dont wanna end up as the corpse haha!

i kinda like the quote as well

When you can live forever, what do you live for?

so.. when you CAN'T live forever, what would be worth dying for?

Tuesday, November 18, 2008 ( 12:38 AM )

cutting back on all the sorry details,

the last few days i have been sitting in a shit hole i somehow dug n fell in myself, wallowed in there, moping around for 2-3 days actually, n had real trouble trying to get out coz the sides were slippery. ahh whatever, anyway, the most important thing now is that I'M OUT OF THE SHIT HOLE! =) im back to my normal, sane, self so no need to worry! thank you to those who have listened to me n helped me out when i was at the lowest of my low..what would i do without friends like u! =D

Saturday, November 15, 2008 ( 8:25 PM )

aww shucks. its that random bout of depression n cynical pessimism come to wreck havoc in my emotional life once again.

been feeling restless recently, with only 2 days of work, no tuition, n an absolute state of nothingness for me to do. i will sit around at home, watch stupid shows on tv till im so sick of tv now.. and i have nothing to do!! omg..i need to find something to do with my life.. i feel so unsatisfied right now.

i dont know whats wrong with me. everyone's in uni now, mugging for exams, if not, they're working. i hate to admit it but i feel godawesomely lonely. i have nobody to talk to, nobody to hang out with(cept val), i don't even have a chance to go meet new people.. everyone seems to be milling about with their own lives, busy as they are and i feel very isolated. at least next yr if im in university, id have a CLASS, id get to meet new people, id have something to DO! better state than now, im sure. even my siblings are busy with their own things. a family of 6 but i can't even find enough people to play monopoly with me(you see how desperate i am?)

i cant sleep at night, i keep eating coz im bored and frustrated, i feel like spending all my money, i feel so pent up with frustration, i feel like everyone i used to know has vanished into thin air. what have i been doing with my life? how come all of a sudden i feel like im all alone, where are my friends? loner stoner joyce, what have you to say for yourself? its my own fault for being so anti social n aloof n i know ive got a temper which is weird as a purple giraffe..

n since i dont even hv anyone to complain to, now im ranting to myself.

Friday, November 14, 2008 ( 11:44 PM )

happy bday jean n soon to be happy birthday val! my dearest friends through my sec sch days =D

we mailed a package to melbourne for jean n she just went to collect it today! hahaha good timing la! although e package arrived 2-3 days earlier.. LOL maybe she knew it was for her bday so she waited till today then go collect

anyway, met aloha val for dinner at maui wowi cafe at suntec.. e hawaiin themed coffee cjill-out place.. wahaha she was so excited and snapping photos of every corner of the restaurant like a little happy girl.. must admit the food is rather good! but i don't have much choice there -.-" hahaha had a hawaiin garden salad and mushroom soup (very nice!!) n hungry val ate her pasta n spicy chicken drumlets.. LOL by the time i got home, i was hungry again though, so time for supper!

haha i wanna go back there for their breakfast some day! they have pancakes!! =DD what would i do without u huh val! we still have to meet up another day again to look at taiwan trip itenaries hehehe! see, must find excuse to ask u out again leh, cause nobody else wanna go out with me =( hahaha

oh oh oh and i think that guy who tried to commit suicide by provoking the tigers to kill him is damn stupid! what a way to die! thats a first.. LOL creative way to commit suicide ah.. maybe he think more exciting den getting smashed by mrt trains wahaha.. but he sabo the white tigers lo! when i was volunteering there, the tigers looked very calm n nice! not fierce n violent.. so i was shocked at first when i heard the news.. reasonable explanation as well la! they only attacked him coz he provoked them -.-" haha slow and painful death man..but i won't say i pity him!

somehow, i want to go jurong bird park! i wanna feed the lorries! haha val! go with me la!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008 ( 9:10 PM )

so....... we will be adopting my cousin's 4 rabbits! but first must think of a place to house them, probably in the patio, but have to think of a way to set up such that the stray cats won't get to them n make a meal out of them first! '

down with sore throat

tmr interview at starbucks.. but not im having second thoughts.. should i even get a job??

Monday, November 10, 2008 ( 12:55 AM )

a day of fulfillment and satisfaction!

firstly, i finished studying for my diving theory test!

next, accompanied my sis to shop but in e end i couldnt resist n bought a couple of things for myself as well, of which was a super nice top from desigual!! n i feel satisfied! n happy at spending my own money wahaha okie that sounds kinda dumb but its okie! my best excuse- chinese new yr clothes la! n to date i think i have bought like erm 5 "chinese new yr clothes" alrdy HAHAHA

n had some auntie annes pretzel while we were shopping, which satisfied my craving! plus dinner was a wonderful jap dinner at my aunt's house.. pleased my stomach greatly.. sushi, udon, steamed egg, etc. SHIOK! plus kettle honey mustard potato chips! (sin sin sinned) LOL

n one more thing! remember i gave my cousin a pair of rabbits on her bday n they gave birth? now my aunt has given up.. she says she cant cope coz her house rly is too small n cant accomodate them.. so i was trying to find someone to adopt them but now, somehow managed to convince my mum n dad so we're adopting ALL FOUR of my cousin's rabbits! hehe!! coz its partially our fault la.. buying the rabbits as a bday present..should have asked my aunt first b4 buying..its a heavy responsibility.. keeping a pet.. yep! so we're taking them lo =) but just gotta figure out how to keep them.. my mum wants to put them at the patio.. so we gotta think of a way to put them in a play pen n also prevent the stray cats from getting to them.. dont want them to end up as food!! (coz there are a few resident stray cats around our area)

yuuuuup~! with all that said, its now about time for me to have a satisfying good nights rest =) working tmr!

Saturday, November 8, 2008 ( 11:15 PM )

first we went to old airport road for breakfast-my most favourite meal of the day =D !! then we drove over to kallang leisure park to watch Quantum of Solace early in e morn at 10.30AM..my mum likes that place coz there's no crazy crowds haha we almost had the whole cinema to ourselves! =X

after that, met shiyong at cedele for my fav carrot cake! n of course chitchat n to pass him his super super belated bday prez =X hehe! found out some juicy news from our gossip session!

next, it was the egypt trip briefing.. wahaha omg! i want to faint! coz they're weird people in my tour group! shucks. wahaha a whole gay-aqua-tranny-drag queen club of 6-10 people will be joining us for the trip.. dang! what a shock i got when they sashayed into the room.. LOL n they r quite rowdy n ill-mannered.. keep interrupting n not paying attention to the lady who was briefing us.. wahaha but they R indeed quite funny! im sure it'll spice things up n they're quite friendly la just that sometimes they don't know when to shut up! hehe they'd better keep quiet on the trip when the tour guide is talking else i will go over n tell the in a POLITE n CALM manner to shut up.. LOL i shall be their good friend n take pictures when im there k! cant wait!! we get to climb mount sinai on one of the days.. its about 5 hrs trek up the mountain, starting at 2AM, to catch the sunrise on the top of the mountain.. ZOMG!! im really excited n anticipating that one =D i kinda like climbing mountains after climbing the tian jing mountain leh! unbelievable!

tmr i shall study my diving textbook =D good girl.

Thursday, November 6, 2008 ( 9:03 PM )

I am an Independent Thinker

CLICK

( 1:25 AM )

first time i'm sad that exams are over coz its leaving my kinda job-less right now.. financial crisis la! no more tuition..hahaha

so now, im only working on mon n tue at mount pleasant.. i feel very broke all of a sudden =(

school-less n job-less- not a very desirable situation! haha and now even val my pal has found a job! i'm all alone now wahaha!! i dont think anyone wants to hire me for like.. 2 months right? shucks

but nvm! i would keep an open mind n try to think of something, OR just make the most out of the last few months here!

things that i want to do:

1) HORSERIDING

2) ROCK CLIMBING

3) ARCHERY

4) PASS MY DIVING THEORY reTEST (next thursday)

the diving text is SUCH A BORE!! OMG, how m i gonna get thru it..

Saturday, November 1, 2008 ( 4:31 PM )

im so restless!

last wk it was insonmia

this wk, its sleepy sleepy..

zzz

Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts; We're Empty

SCRIBBLINGS

an outlet for my creative juices to flow

MY FAVOURITE THINGS

Rise and shine my dear, my darling,
Sunshine through the window, birds are calling.
Awake from your sweet, sweet slumber,
Your day awaits, with many new wonders.

Cactus plants on your windowsill come to life,
Growing with vigour, they greet you with feist.
Fluffy white clouds sail across the sky,
Look up, look out, as love comes cruising by.

Wear a bright coloured top and your favourite scent,
Matched with a smile and your ribbon headband.
Carry with you some laughter in your heart,
For a little joy would bring you some luck.

The aroma of freshly brewed coffee wafts through the air,
Tempting, tantalising, drawing you close unaware.
A soy cappuccino in your left, an old book in your right,
Spend some time with yourself; blow some bubbles, fly a kite.

Sounds of the sea come together like a melody,
Notes played on the piano, a perfect rhapsody.
Dreamy weekend filled with my favourite things,
And peace fluttering by on white dove wings.

MOON
A pearl glowing luminous in the dark.
Beautiful. Tragically lonesome.
Tear drops glistening as i looked up.
Tragic. Lonesomely beautiful.

Disco ball spinning amidst parties of stars,
Glitzy, smoky, mysteriously enchanting.
Spotlight glaring down on an empty stage,
Naked, forsaken, enchantingly mysterious.

Outside my window, the night sky loomed.
Inky, somber, ominous, enigmatic.
DARK.
Dark against the pearl, my tears, disco ball, spotlight.

As i lust after the pearl so coveted,
I brush away tears undiscovered.
Drifting along under flashes of the disco ball,
I'm shrinking away from the spotlight where i used to belong.

My moon, so bright, perfectly round tonight.
My heart, heavy. Filled with thoughts of you inside.
Your heart, so light, perfectly sound this night.
Your moon, my moon. Our moon.
Your heart, is now her heart. Sweethearts.
My moon. I'll moon. Over you tonight.

my little tribute to the full moon tonight n the mysteries it brings. for what power the quiet night has, that tugs on heart strings, stirring emotions and letting loose inspiration.

MISSION P.C.

“Sssh!” The coast is clear! Sam and Joyce, heartbeats thumping with excitement, miniature drums beating furiously against their chests, hid behind the door of the room. Yet in the background of the heavy rhythm of the drums, there was the hint of laughter, a giggle perhaps, faintly chiming in the midst of all the commotion.

They were on an important mission. Top secret and highly classified. Stealth, speed and skill were the key factors. They had to initiate the machine- technical expertise was called for. Grasped tightly in their fists were the precious artefacts, which they could not afford to forget.

The matriarch had left the premises about 5 minutes ago and the girls had got into their positions without much haste. Silence filled the room, with the exception of that incessant drumbeat and the imperceptible flitter of glee. The curtains were left undrawn, blocking out much of the sunshine from the outside world. In the dim-lit room, the musky smell wafted by each time they inhaled. It smelt of old lacquered wood mixed with that distinctive smell of fresh paper, dappled with a pinch of a metallic scent- ink, they gathered. The machine sat solemnly at the other corner of the room, enticing, anticipating the girls’ next move. So calm and composed it seemed, patiently waiting for something to happen, like the calm before the storm.

The time for action had come. There was to be no delay. They had to get to the machine, activate it, fulfill their task and retreat, leaving no clues behind of their presence, all before the matriarch returned.

“On the count of 3! 1… 2… 3!” Joyce scurried over to the corner of the room, taking cover behind the machine as Sam followed behind, light-footed and nimble, after shutting the door behind her quietly and deftly turning the lock. Nobody had seen them. Good. For how dangerous and risky this was, with the door being slightly translucent. They had succeeded in securing the room. Now all they had to do was to complete their task and retreat.

The drumbeats faded slowly. Having done this before, Joyce took the lead, guiding and instructing Sam as she went along, activating the machine. With the push of a few specific buttons, a green light blinked on and the machine whirred to life. A cheeky grin smirked on their faces, still balled up in their fists were the artefacts. The giggle in the background began to grow louder, their hearts lighter.

Joyce gingerly lifted the lid of the machine, delicately placing the artefact from her hand onto the glistening panel, smoothening it out. She had to make sure the artefact was placed exactly within the specified margins or the plan would not work. After double-checking that everything was in place, she shut the lid with silent confidence. Sam stood close, observing carefully and learning the procedure for it would be her turn next. With a steady finality to it all, Joyce then pushed the big green button. The machine beeped and started to move, scanning the artefact across from one end to the other. Then, with a sudden burst of energy, it began to chug. Slowly at first, then picking up speed, its rhythm most peculiarly irregular yet hypnotic.

The giggle rose up like a bubble and broke as Joyce gave a little quip. It looks like her task was almost completed! Just as abruptly as it started, the chugging stopped and the machine gave out a loud beep, announcing that its job had been done. Breaking into a smile, lips curling upwards to reveal her teeth, Joyce reached out for the document that slid out onto the tray. As she laid her eyes on the result of her meticulous planning, rumbling laughter erupted from her little body as she held it up proudly with both hands, displaying it for Sam to see. Sam doubled over, clutching her stomach. She could hardly believe what she saw. It was like magic! Sam could not help but join in the throes of uncontrollable laughter and celebration of her sister’s success.

There, imprinted on the stark white sheet of paper, was the unmistakable, most humouring thing of all- the perfect print of her favourite snoopy panties!

Joyce and Sam laughed until tears began to form in their eyes as they repeated the process, Sam enthusiastically trying out her first shot at this.

Then came the screeching of the main gate and the grumble of the matriarch vehicle. She had returned. Each holding about 2-3 copies of warm and crisply printed paper in their hands, Sam and Joyce quickly snatched up their prized possessions and “certificates of achievements”, flipped the power switch to OFF, putting the machine back to sleep and dashed out of the study room. In a flash of motions, they quickly stashed the evidence in the secret compartment in their closet and rushed to the living room, plopped themselves on the sofa, turned on the television and acted like they had been watching Powerpuff Girls this whole time.

Still giggling intermittently at the outrageous adventure they just had, it was perfect timing as the main door clicked open and in stepped the matriarch. “Hi, Mom!” Both girls called in that coyly sweet voice of theirs, plastered on their faces were the “ innocent-puppy-eyed” expressions.

With a nod of approval, their mummy dearest carried her bag of groceries to the kitchen and Sam and Joyce let loose their infectious but final bout of laughter. With a high-five to seal the deal, there was nothing more exhilarating and satisfying than a task well planned and executed. What more was there to say, other than- MISSION PANTY-COPY ACCOMPLISHED!